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Love Your Life Again -- Certified EFT, NLP and IET Therapist
Marta Misiak EFT Practitioner

Hi. My name is Marta, and I am an adult child of a borderline parent. I look younger than I am. I became 80 when I was 5 years old. I became an adult when I was 5. I became a parent to my parents. I was made responsible for my BPD parent's emotional immaturity, and my non-BPD parent's inability to protect me from it.

I have healed and have been healing from 25 years of growing up and living in a home with my mum who had Borderline Personality Disorder. I am here to help other adult children of borderline parents (My Story).

Who I aim to work with

You know how people who

-- grew up at home with a parent who was like an emotional ticking bomb, never knowing when they would explode with anger and frustration,

-- walked on eggshells at home, trying to be invisible,

-- grew up feeling like a target for offloading anger and frustration,

-- felt disrespected and humiliated,

-- felt punished for whatever they did,

-- felt fear and numbness at home,

-- experienced physical violence at home,

-- did not feel loved, safe and secure.

Struggle with

-- seeing their own value,

-- having issues with setting their own boundaries,

-- the feeling of powerlessness and hopelessness,

-- the feeling of not belonging and being different,

-- the feeling of being unsuccessful and not deserving,

-- the fear of conflicts, pleasing others,

-- standing up for themselves.

Well, what I help them achieve is

-- acceptance and belief that their needs are important, they have the right to have them, attend them, and ask from others to fulfil them,

-- how to set boundaries,

-- the feeling of deserving and being worthy,

-- the feeling of safety, support and security,

-- building up self-confidence and the feeling of empowerment.

You know how people who

-- have the feeling that they are not worthy of love, 

-- have the feeling of being unseen and lonely,

-- keep feeling disappointed by their partners, friends, family,

-- don't feel supported,

-- feel they need to prove to others that they're worthy of love,

-- feel that their love is used against them.

Struggle with

-- finding fulfilling love and building healthy relationship,

-- keep ending up in unhappy relationships,

-- meeting men/women who just demand and crave the attention,

​-- focusing on others needs, but ignoring their own,

-- emotional burnout.

Well, what I help them achieve is

-- the feeling of the right to receive,

-- belief that they are worthy of being loved for who they are, just because they are,

-- belief that it is possible to have and build a happy relationship,

-- growing trust in people.

You know how people who

-- has been sexually assaulted,

-- raped,

-- harassed,

-- bullied and

-- discriminated.

Struggle with

-- the feeling of shame, guilt, responsibility for those situations and taking part in it,

-- blaming themselves for it happening,

-- struggle with loving themselves agian.

Well, what I help them achieve is

-- reducing the emotional load of those memories,

-- allowing the memory of it to become insignificant and fade away, just like a memory of last year's snow,

-- finding love and respect for themselves again.

What I help them withis to find love for themselvesin themselves,so that they love their lives again.

Teaching them the skills of how to handle stressful situations independently, knowing that they always have support in me, whenever they need it.

My areas of expertise

My Areas of Expertise

​​​​​​​-- adult children of borderline parents,​
-- emotional manipulation ​
– toxic relationships,​​​
– sexual assault, rape, bulling, discrimination,
– helplessness, powerlessness towards people and situations,​
– disappointment towards people and love, doubt you’ll ever find love.

Do you know anyone who's looking for support in any of these areas? Maybe you're looking for it? Here you can find more examples on how you might feel and think, that show we are a fit.

Need a bit more information? Then, please keep reading 👇.

"We are Loveand Love is all there is"- Sue Beer"Healing the addicted heart".

Why do I choose to work in these areas?

I have personal experience in living and overcoming these situations.

I know how it is:

  • to feel lonelywanting to love and be lovednot being able to build a happy and fulfilling relationship,

  • to try to fix others and make them happy, as if your happiness depended on theirs and vice versa,

  • to confront someone for crossing your boundaries, feel guilt afterwards as you believe you might have hurt them, so you wonder if you should make it up to them,

  • to feel unsafeinsecure, unworthy, not good enough,

  • to be denied the right to have and enjoy things as a child, and how that influences your approach towards money in your adult life,

  • to experience sexual assault, rape and harassment, leading to feelings of guilt and shame afterwards, and self-blame,

  • to feel powerless and hopeless in situations that you actually would like to stand up for yourself.

I know how a situation can feel normal as that's how it's always been, since you remember, but you've always felt there was something wrong,

I know relationships that make you ache to the point of complete and utter emotional burn out… You end one just so you can start another one that leaves you as pumped-out as the previous one,

I know the feeling of not belonging and being different…

I've experienced discrimination due to my status (e.g. marital, social, background, origin, childless/parents) and bullying.

And that is just to name a few.

I know how much energy, and time, and self-work, and self-change, and courage it demands and how tiring it can be… and this questions in your head: “Will I ever get better? Will I ever get rid of it all? How much longer?”

I know it is possible to heal if you want to do it.

Why do I choose to work in these areas

"If it's hysterical,it's historical"

How EFT has helped me.

The reason I have decided to work with EFT and NLP is because I have used it, both as self-applied methods and with a certified EFT Practitioner, to heal my own emotional wounds from the past (My Story).

I tried yoga and I tried meditation. I tried breathing. I liked it, but It only helped to ease up some of the symptoms I had. None of them helped me heal my emotions and body. The symptoms were coming back again and again.

 

The symptoms are a way for the body and subconscious mind to tell you that there's an issue that has deeper roots. I needed to get to the bottom of the issues to stop the symptoms.

 

I was also supposed to feel grounded after the classes, but that expression was as unknown to me as calculation of go/no-go reentry point for Friendship 7 😆. What does it mean to feel grounded???

How EFT has helped me:

  • It has helped me to reduce and eliminate negative emotions associated with my past, my memories, my family, my unmet needs of love, and safety, and belonging,

  • I cried, I felt anger and sadness during the sessions but at the end of the tapping I was calm, and I didn't feel left alone (vs. the traditional therapy where I would just feel frustration and the need to understand, the constant “why” in my head, + my whole body would shake),

  • It allowed me to access the buried emotions, that I didn't know I had (at some point in my life, anger was covered up by disappointment, sadness by resignation, numbness even),

  • I stopped having physical reactions like:

-- digestion problems,

-- my abdominal shaking like crazy in trauma--like similar situation,

-- one of my fingers stopped having open wounds,

-- pain in the low back, pain in the neck, some shoulder pain (still working on those), pain in my right piriformis muscle,

-- itchiness and dandruff of my scalp.

  • I learned how to deal with stressful situations,

  • I learned to listen to my gut feeling,

  • I learned to listen to my body -- any tension, any contraction, any shakiness tells me something about myself and the situation I am in,

  • I learned to understand my emotions -- they are there to tell me something about a person, situation, myself,

  • I learned to accept my emotions for what they are without the nonsense of that I shouldn't feel this or that, 

​And that what it means to be grounded.

I am able to analyse why I have these “negative” emotions, tap on them and come to the core issue of what triggers them. So that I can let them go. So that I can deactivate the “red buttons” that were installed by my family and the negative surrounding, that I have been carrying with me since childhood - this is the most important skill I have learned!

I wasn't left alone, high on emotions, when finishing my therapy sessions with an EFT Practitioner. 

I would love others to have the chance to heal their emotional wounds and body, and to gain the knowledge how to deal with any possible future issues.

And these are the reason to why I have decided to work using EFT and NLP.

What do you think about it? Does any of the issues mentions above affect you? Need to know a bit more? Please, read below on how the sessions look like 👇.

Effectiveness of EFT
How EFT has helped me
Shortly on how sessions look like
Decorating your future

Shortly on how the sessions look like

​​During my sessions, we tap on specific acupressure points on the body to release negative emotions and beliefs. That helps you reprogram your thoughts, so you stop repeating the same old mistakes. You learn to see what was unseeable before: that there's a different way to live your life.

Tapping facilitates the flow of the thoughts, reduces the emotional load, and allows the subconscious mind to connect the dots between different situations. So we can reach the core issue and see the negative pattern, that you've been repeating.

I keep an eye contact with you. I tune into your voice and intonation. All this allows me to observe any non-verbal reactions and emotions that are controlled by your subconscious and stored deep inside your body. So that your body helps me to help you.

Sometimes, it's not enough just to heal the past. When it's a deep wound, especially the one from a childhood, we tend to have imprinted and programmed behaviours, beliefs about ourselves, ways of talking, being etc. that we keep repeating. Healing the past is one thing, but how about your future? , What do you want? How do you want it? Who do you want to be? How do you want to react, behave? What kind of people you want to surround yourself with…?

When used properly by a compassionate therapist, who has worked through her own trauma, like me, EFT and NLP are great tools to help a person. You're not only healing your past. You're also decorating your future. Just like you decorate a flat, you pick and choose what you want in your life, how you want to be, who you want to surround yourself with.

 

Let me rephrase a quote from Ted Hughes's book “The Iron Man”, “You are who you choose to be”, and write You have a choice to become who you choose to be. Who your heart has always wanted you to be.

I combine both EFT and NLP to create the best possible aid that would bring peace and healing.​ It means that no session is the same and no method is the same for each individual. In my opinion, this creates the most individually adjusted tool that a therapist can use with a client.

Pictures from a session

I do not have a video of a session to show you how it looks like. I don't even want to ask a client for such a thing. That's a hard pass from my side. Every session is confidential and it remains that way.

 

However, I hope these pictures of me from one of the sessions, help you feel and see how a session might look like. All sessions might differ slightly, depending on the client, it might be more of this or less of that. There's a lot of tapping.

I do not require a business attire. I just ask you to find a place you're comfortable in, feel free to talk and tap and visualise. A session in a forest and a park, on the phone, took place as well -- as long as you are comfortable and there's internet connection.

Please, check the FAQ for more information. If you don't find an answer to your question, I invite you to contact me.

I think the pictures are best viewed when clicked to enlarge. Then you'll be able to spot Joy, how she's sneaking and checking on me from behind.

What are your thoughts about what you've read so far? Do you see yourself working with me? Maybe you know someone who would be interested in my support? Please, don't hesitate to contact me or pass the information to that person. The 1-hour-long information session is free of charge, so that we can feel if we connect with each other.

The three questions
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